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pascal_curious) wrote2007-01-16 07:02 pm
Chapter 6: Uterus Sprouts Eternal
I have heard it said that the miracle of birth is a beautiful thing to behold. It’s a lie. At least from my perspective; It is painful and it is messy.
I don’t recall how I got from the outside to my bed. I assume I fainted. Lazlo, Nervous and Vidcund must have helped me inside. I won’t go into the gory details but I will say that my fear of a scene like in the movie “Alien” was not completely unfounded. The birth scene in the film was actually quite accurate. Well, accurate except for the death part, the blood and guts part, and the hideous toothy alien spawn part. When all was said and done, I was left with a tiny life resting on my chest. She was neither ugly nor bizarre looking. She was very human looking. Had it not been for her greenish skin and black eyes she would have appeared absolutely normal. As I looked down on her as she shivered and squalled, I concluded that she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
Lazlo and Nervous stared, dumbfounded.
“Holy shit,” Lazlo mumbled.
“Yeah,” Nervous mumbled back.
Tired and sore as I was, I seemed to be the only one with my faculties fully intact.
“Can we have a blanket or something please?” I asked.
Lazlo and Nervous snapped back into reality at the sound of my voice.
“Uh, yeah,” answered Lazlo. “I’ll get a blanket and some towels, and Nervous can get a plastic bag some string and a pair of scissors.”
“What!?” I vociferated, putting my arms protectively around my newborn daughter. “What exactly do you plan on doing?”
“We have to clean this mess up,” Lazlo explained. “I mean, there’s blood everywhere, a placenta on the bed and her umbilical cord is still attached,” he said with a grimace.
“When did you become such an expert in childbirth?” I snapped. I was relieved he wasn’t planning on getting rid of the baby, just the mess.
“When did you sprout a uterus?” he quipped in return.
Lazlo left the room in a huff, Nervous close behind him. With the two of them out of the room I was able to see Vidcund, sitting quietly on a chair in the corner of the room. All of the color had drained from his face and he looked as though he had just had a terrifying premonition. Without a word, he stood up and approached the bed. He pulled the sheet aside to expose my stretched, scarred and sore belly. He stared at it for a moment, and then at the baby in my arms.
He turned to the full length mirror across the room and took off his shirt. Radiating from his navel was a starburst pattern of scars identical to the scarring I found on my own stomach after I was returned from the alien ship. He realized that the scars were evidence that his body, too, had been altered to support the growth and birth of an alien baby. He left without a word, the front door slamming behind him. I could hear the starting of his car and the squealing of tires as he sped away.
Having just experienced the birth of an alien infant, I sympathized with him. He had just witnessed what would probably be happening to him in about 9 month’s time. It wasn’t an experience I would wish on anyone. How women cope with childbearing I will never understand. If it had been left up to men to bear children, the human race would certainly have gone extinct long ago.
Due to his sometimes arrogant and egotistical demeanor Vidcund had always been a bit of a loner. Lazlo and I would have been glad to console him, but after our mother passed away Vic became withdrawn from the rest of the family. He always had an especially close relationship with Mom, but now that she was gone Vidcund would find his own way to cope with the foreknowledge of his impending fatherhood. He knew he could find solace with his childhood sweetheart Circe Beaker or, if he wanted to be alone, he could go to the old radio towers. We used to go to the towers when we were kids and wanted to crack open a few beers of smoke some happy herbs without getting caught. It was also the most popular make-out spot in town, or so I had been told. Most girls wouldn’t give me the time of day, even if I had a bag on my head.
I chuckled to myself at the memory of times that seemed to be a million years ago. I hadn’t thought of our nights at the towers in a long time. Lazlo always knew where to get some happy herbs and someone would always have something stolen from their parent’s liquor cabinet. We spent many a night smoking and drinking while playing AD&D by firelight or gazing at the stars and talking about girls.
“Now don’t you think that because your daddy did it when he was young that you will be able to do those things too,” I instructed my tiny daughter. “Drugs are bad, m’kay?”
“I’m not touching it, you do it,” announced Nervous as he and Lazlo returned.
Lazlo looked at the mess on the bed and grimaced. “No way. You can do it”
“But you’re the one who knows what to do,” argued Nervous.
“Only ‘cause I saw it on an episode of ER, it’s not like I’m an obstetrician or anything.”
“Just give me a damn blanket please,” I pleaded. Both the baby and I were shivering in the cold, wet, and soiled bed linens.
Lazlo handed me a blanket and I swaddled my daughter in it while they argued on who would cut the umbilical cord and ‘dispose’ of the placenta.
“Let’s call Circe,” suggested Nervous. “She is an EMT, she will know what to do.” They both looked at me, searching for approval.
“Whatever,” I yawned. Exhaustion was finally setting in and I really didn’t care who took care of business. I just wanted it over with so I could get a little sleep.
Nervous pulled out his cell phone and dialed home.
“Hey, Circe.”
We both could hear the shrill voice on the other end berating Nervous for calling at four in the morning.
“Um,” Nervous stammered, trying to think of how to explain what had just happened. “I’m with Lazlo and Pascal, and Pascal is, well…..hurt. Do you think you could come over and see if you can help him?”
“What have you idiots done now?” screamed Circe’s voice over the tiny phone. “And what have you done to Vidcund? He just got here and he won’t even talk to me. He just sits and stares at the wall.” There was a brief moment of silence before Circe added, “You
guys haven’t killed anyone have you?”
“No, we haven’t killed anyone,” Nervous winged.
“He doesn’t need to go to the hospital does he,” she asked. “Because if he does you can just call 911; I don’t want to be associated with whatever you morons have been up to.”
“He’s not dying or anything, I promise,” vowed Nervous.
“We will be there in a few minutes. Just don’t do anything else stupid.”
There was a click and Nervous flipped his phone closed. “I love you too, mommy,” he mocked in a singsong voice. “Cow. She’s just pissed because Vidcund is so freaked out and she’s not getting any nookie.”
I drifted off to sleep as we waited, my last thoughts being of what to name my very special little girl.
In a little rosewood pencil box
I was actually reading some of your stuff last night and really enjoyed it. I am happy to have you friend me as long as you don't mind me friending you back.
Re: In a little rosewood pencil box
My stuff is just silly, not real writing like yours. Thank you though. I look forward to reading more. :)
Re: In a little rosewood pencil box
Thanks!