Dear Chloe and Lola

[pascal_curious]

Dear Chloe and Lola,
 
Once again I have not made good on my promise to write to you more often. Please do not take that to mean that I have forgotten you. You are never out of my thoughts. Difficult times may have struck my little family, but I have not forgotten that you are my family as well, and deserving of as much attention.
 
Jenny has left home. It was not as we had anticipated. I had thought that her leaving the nest would be a bittersweet moment, as she went of to university. Instead it has been a bitter moment, full of misunderstanding and angry words. It is my fault she has left, but I know, as a father, I have done the right thing. I set the appropriate boundaries; unfortunately Jenny did not see it that way. I keep asking myself if I could have handled the situation a bit more diplomatically, but no amount of second, third and fourth guessing has brought me to the conclusion that I could have acted any differently and still call myself a good father. Kitty has stood beside me in my decision and agrees that a boundary had to be set for Jenny’s own good. I know Kitty had a discussion with Jen just before she left us, but Jen was determined that there was no other way.
 
I wish that there was a way to make our children see that acting on their emotions, no matter how strong and all-consuming, that things will not always end in a happily ever after.
 

After months of nagging and badgering from both Kitty and I, Jen agreed to finally introduce us to her mystery boyfriend. A date was set for a family dinner after which she and Johnny would be going off to a movie. I wasn’t sure what I was expecting this Johnny character to be. I had thought he might be a student from LFT, home on summer break, or maybe a boy visiting family here in town. It was already established that he wasn’t a classmate of hers, or her brothers. 

He arrived on time and was very polite. He kindly presented my wife with a bottle of wine to be enjoyed with dinner. He thanked us for inviting him into our home and seemed anxious to meet Jenny’s brothers. He acted, in every way, a gentleman. He was a bit oddly dressed; his jacket didn’t really match his too-short pants, and orange socks could be seen peeking out over what appeared to be bowling shoes. His shirt might have been considered quite nice, had it not been for the pattern of loud pink hibiscus flowers all over it.

 

I took a few minutes to get to know him while Jenny helped Vidcund and Kitty prepare dinner. It quickly became apparent to me that he was much older than Jenny. He explained that he wasn’t in university, but had full time employment in surveillance. He would not elaborate further on his employment due to what he described as “confidentiality concerns”. I work in an environment where confidentiality and security are of utmost importance, so I didn’t further question him about his employment. After my conversation with him, I had no immediate reason to object to their relationship; only a concern in their age differences, which I had yet to discover the extent of.

 

Kitty, Jenny, and Vidcund worked together to provide us with a delicious dinner of salmon steaks, steamed yellow squash, and strawberry cheesecake for dessert. The conversation during dinner was pleasant. During a quiet moment, when everyone was absorbed in masticating, I got a good look at Johnny under the bright dining room lights. I found his appearance very unsettling. He had extremely pale skin with an almost greenish hue. His nose was tiny, almost to the point of non-existence, and the tops of his ears were pointed. He had a very distinctive appearance; one that would be hard to forget. He must have felt my gaze on him because he suddenly looked up and our eyes met. A chill ran over me. I knew those black eyes, and I knew him. He looked away quickly and returned to his dinner. He was very quiet the rest of the evening. I think he understood that I recognized him.

 

After Johnny and Jen left to go to their movie, I sent the boys to their bedrooms so that Kitty and I could talk. I asked her what she thought of Johnny. She said she though he was very gentlemanly and seemed very kind. She remarked on how he went out of his way to engage Jenny’s brothers in conversation. When I asked her about his unusual appearance she said she didn’t think that there was anything that unusual about him; he was a bit pale, but not altogether unattractive. This made me wonder. His extraterrestrial appearance was obvious to me. I was curious if the boys had noticed his unusual appearance. Jenny clearly had not. I wondered if he had some innate ability to obscure his appearance. (I have often also wondered if, as the two of you grew and went out into the world, others would be very aware of your appearances. There are so many questions I would like to ask you about so many things.) 

I told Kitty that I recognized him and where I recognized him from. (Kitty has known about the both of you from very early on in our relationship, so she took me very seriously.) It was difficult to define how I recognized Johnny. It was almost like remembering something from a dream. It was a hazy, confused recollection, but there was no doubt in my mind who Johnny was. He was the source of the other half of your DNA. He appeared, now, the same as he had in my flash of a memory. That memory was twenty years old. This made it impossible to explain what Johnny’s actual age might be. It also spawned other questions and possibilities. Did he recognize me? If he did, why was so interested in my daughter? Was he here to monitor my family, or was he here to monitor you? DID HE KNOW WHERE YOU WERE? I was torn between my desire to find you and the desire to protect my family. Ultimately, I decided it was best to protect my children (Jen, Pascal, Lazlo, and Vidcund) from him (and his kind). I knew that you were well taken care of by your mother, and if his interests were in you, it certainly would not be to bring you harm. This does not mean that you mean less to me than the children I have now. I am thankful, everyday, that you were brought into my life (even though I didn’t realize it at first), and I am confident that you are well protected and cared for (as illustrated by my inability to locate you). I am the only protection for the family I have here. It is hard to explain that while I love you and am grateful to have had you, the experience I went through that brought you into my life is not one that I would wish on anyone. I’m not willing to take the chance that “Johnny” is here to scope the opportunities presented in my children. I hope you understand, and can forgive me for not exploring the possibility that Johnny could bring us together.

 

Kitty was very understanding and didn’t question any of my conclusions. The only problem we could find was how to tell Jenny that we did not approve of her relationship with Johnny. (Jenny and the boys do not know about you. It is my shame that has kept me from telling them. I know it is cowardly, but I do not want them to think less of me.) We decided the best argument we had to go on was their difference in age. Jenny is eighteen, and legally can do anything she chooses, but as long as she chose to stay under our roof and accept our offer to provide her an education, she would have to abide by our rules. I knew it would not be easy, or go well, but I had to forbid Jen from seeing Johnny. 

I waited up for her to return from her date. She returned before her curfew and she and Johnny indulged in a rather intimate and extended goodbye on the front porch. After she came into the house, I calmly explained the situation as well as I could. Unfortunately it quickly turned into a shouting match that woke up everyone in the house. Jenny stormed to her room and slammed the door. She refused to discuss the matter any further.  

It was the next morning, just after sunrise, that I heard her leave. I watched from her bedroom window as she left with Johnny Smith. Kitty told me she talked to Jenny before she left. Jenny said that she refused to live in a house where she couldn’t be trusted. I wish I had been there to tell her that it wasn’t her that I didn’t trust.

 
Jenny has been gone for a few months now. We have not heard from her at all. We do not know where she is living and if she is still planning to attend university next month. Kitty has taken it all very hard, which has not been good for her health. The boys have not said much about the situation, except for Vidcund. It was only a week after Jenny had left when Vic asked if he could have Jenny’s bedroom.

Kitty has been a rock through this whole ordeal. I know how deeply it has hurt her, and it has taken a terrible toll on her already fragile health. She still greets every day with a smile, even though I know she suffers not only with emotional pain but physical as well. 

I recall telling you in one of my previous letters that Kitty had been losing weight and I was worried about her health. It took a lot of nagging from all of us, but Kitty finally went to her doctor. I wasn’t too concerned when the doctor ordered a panel of tests, but that quickly changed when she called Kitty into the office to discuss the results, rather than discuss them over the telephone. I accompanied Kitty to her appointment. I don’t know who was more scared, she or I. Kitty and I sat side-by-side in the uncomfortable office chairs, clutching each other’s hands for mutual support as the doctor explained the tests that had been performed and the results. Endometrial Cancer. Kitty seemed very calm when she received the diagnosis. I wish I could say that I had reacted with as much composure as she did. More appointments were made for second opinions, counseling, surgery, and more testing. I think Kitty had been thinking a great deal about the possible outcome of her tests; she had many questions for the doctor and asked for detailed explanations of things she didn’t understand. The doctor explained that she would not be able to determine the exact stage of the cancer until a hysterectomy had been performed. A few weeks later, the surgery was done and the prognosis was not good. The cancer had spread past the uterus and into the lymph glands and bladder. Kitty has since completed her radiation therapy. She is still very fatigued and has had some other uncomfortable side-effects, but it hasn’t stopped her from being “Super Mom”. She is up every morning in time to make breakfast and see the boys off to school, and she is always ready with dinner when I come home from work. However, she has not had any choice but to accept help from the boys and I; we have been quite adamant about it. 

 

The boys are each handling the situation in their own ways. They all have been spending more time with their mother, and involving her more in their day to day activities. 

Vidcund, especially, has been spending more time with Kitty. He dotes on her and refuses to let her do anything without his help. He helps every evening with dinner and the washing up. He almost seems to be clinging to her, sometimes to the point of annoying her. He mentioned giving up football this year so he could be around to help Kitty more around the house. 

Kitty gave him such a talking to as I have never heard her give before. Needless to say, Vidcund will be participating in football this year. 

Pascal seems to have become a bit more withdrawn. It worries me a little bit. He prefers to spend quiet moments with his mother, discussing his studies and whatever books he has been reading. He has also taken to spending a lot of time with Kitty in front of the television. It makes me smile to see him watching some of the awful made for TV movies that Kitty loves to watch.   Often times I can’t cuddle with my own wife on the sofa because Pascal is there. 

Lazlo, ever the entertainer, goes even further out of his way to make her laugh. He is quite the comic and manages to keep us all in smiling. 

Despite all the emotional upheaval, Lazlo still has his strange little whims. His most recent interest, however, is a bit more involved (and less dangerous) than his previous ones. During the time that Kitty was undergoing her radiation therapy Lazlo came to me and expressed his desire to build a greenhouse in the back yard. He didn’t have an explanation for his sudden interest in botany, but I wasn’t going to ask. It was enough to me that he was still able to find interesting things to explore. 
 

 

 

 

He and Kitty had a wonderful time together making plans for the greenhouse, selecting exotic flowers and other plants to fill the greenhouse with. There are still seed catalogs in every room of the house, and we receive more every day. It was extraordinary to see the three boys come together to build the greenhouse. 

 

 

 

Pascal helped Lazlo with the plans, and they all banded together to get the thing built. Kitty enjoyed spending evenings out on the patio, supervising her sons as they worked on the construction. She laughed at their inexperience with power tools and was happy to tell them whenever they missed a spot with a paintbrush.

 

 

 
It’s sad that it takes something like illness to bring people together the way it does. While every day I go through fits of anger and sadness at the unfairness of it all, I am able to find solace in the fact that this all has made my little family so much closer. I only wish that Jenny was here to be a part of it. In a perfect world, all of my children (including the both of you) would be here with me so that we could experience every day, with all of its joys and sorrows, together.
 

 

 
I’m not going to make a promise to you that I will write again soon. I don’t know if it is a promise that I will be able to keep. I can only promise that I will try. Every letter that I put into the mailbox renews my hope that we will, some day, be together as a family. I know that one of these days one of my letters will find you.
 
I think of you always.
Your loving father,
Glarn Curious

  
 

 

 

Comments

[katee412.livejournal.com]

It's so heartbreaking to see the troubles Glarn and the family are facing, and his regret about leaving Chloe and Lola is obvious in the letters. Once again your portrayal of these characters is just amazing!

[pascal-curious.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! **blushes**

I only have a few more letters left and they only get harder to write as I go along. I don't know what I'm going to do after all the letters have been read. I really like doing them. I'll have to come up with some other device to throw in backstory.

I can't wait until Pascal decides to shre all that he has learned with his brothers. This letter in particular has given him a lot to think about. I wouldn't want to be PT9.

[the_mctavishams.livejournal.com]

This is such a great story. I really love seeing everyone this young :)

I'm very intrigued to see how Glarn takes the news about Jenny and "Johnny" (PolyT#4...)

[the_mctavishams.livejournal.com]

also the scene where they are building the greenhouse is incredible! Where did you find all that stuff?! That's a great set. :D

[pascal-curious.livejournal.com]

I believe all of the construction stuff came from MTS2, the creator used to be tigmom4x but has since changed her name. I just did a search for "construction". I had a hell of a time figuring out the eaves for the roof (there are like a million pieces), I don't think they are objects I will be using often; there is too much thinking required.

I haven't decided exactly what Pascal's reaction to this revelation is going to be. I'm gonna have to think on that one for a while. Maybe he'll just go smack PT9 upside the head for being a creep.

[petalbrook.livejournal.com]

So sad.

[kikumaru-eijiku.livejournal.com]

"Lazlo, ever the entertainer, goes even further out of his way to make her laugh. He is quite the comic and manages to keep us all in smiling. "

I giggled here for a completly different reason. He's so happy about aspirational failure. XD

[pascal-curious.livejournal.com]

Aspiration Failure - it's good clean fun for the whole family!